THANKSgiving

I'm thankful for the whole Thanksgiving shebang. In my humble opinion, it's the best holiday because you don't have to stress about gift giving.
Me: Dad, what do you want for Christmas?
Dad: Uh, I don't know. Nothing.     Sigh.
Instead, you give thanks, hang with family, and eat ridiculous amounts of delicious food. Then you keep up the traditional holiday spirit by scoring deals on Black Friday, just like the Pilgrims did. ...er, probably.

God Bless America.

This post contains none of my recipes. Instead, I've chosen to dedicate it to some select foods prepared by my Grandma(s). It is important for the young college culinarian to sit back and learn from the best.

First things first- the turkey. Golden and crispy on the outside, tender on the inside. Very traditional. Very awesome. None of that crazy turducken junk.

My Grandma's creamy mashed potatoes. Sweet Lordy Jesus. I'm pretty sure this recipe was sent directly from God, floating gracefully down from Heaven on a beam of holy light. I had four helpings. Ok, it was five. Grandma asked my sister and I what we wanted for dessert, and we replied with "more potatoes, please!"

The secret ingredient for creamy potatoes is 8 oz. of divinity. Oops, I mean, cream cheese. But when you think about it, cream cheese is comparable to that of the divine. Mmm.

I had many other pictures, but they are on my sister's camera and she did not send them to me. Punk. Oh well, point of the story is Thanksgiving food (and my Grandmas) rock. What did I contribute? I whisked the gravy. Gotta start from the bottom and work your way up, yo.

I do have one more picture of our Thanksgiving table centerpiece. My sister and I were dying of laughter, our eight year old cousin kept asking what was so funny, and my uncle gave us an epic eye-roll. But I'll leave it up to you for interpretation.

Cranberry Polenta

Thanksgiving is two days away. (!!!) It's my favorite holiday since it involves being with family, watching the Macy's parade, and ingesting mass quantities of food, only to later curse yourself and swear you'll never look at food ever again. And then you eat a turkey with cranberry sauce sandwich.

My fat pants are on standby.

I felt it was imperative to share this recipe since it's Thanksgiving-y. Also because polenta is a seriously underrated side dish. It's incredibly versatile and easy to make. Unfortunately, it often gets pushed aside in favor of the popular kid on the block-- potatoes. Don't get me wrong, I adore those lovely little starch bombs, but it's good to change it up once in a while and get crazy.

Switching potatoes for polenta-- does that qualify me as a wild child?

Polenta can be eaten immediately after cooking if you're looking for a "mashed potato" consistency, placed on a pan and baked, or chilled, cut into shapes and fried. I chose the last option because my inner- Paula Deen was itchin' to get out, y'all. The outside gets crispy while the inside stays soft and gooey.

So enjoy your Thanksgiving and remember all that you're thankful for. My personal list includes family, friends, political science, and Paula Deen. Amen.

Cranberry Polenta    serves: 4
1 cup yellow cornmeal
2 cups water
2 cups chicken broth
1/4 cup dried cranberries, chopped
1 t. butter
1 t. olive oil

1.) Bring water and chicken broth to a boil in a large saucepan. Once boiling, slowly whisk in polenta to avoid lumps.
2.) Add cranberries. Stir until well combined, set heat to low, and cover. Let sit for about 5 minutes, stirring occasionally, until thick.
3.) Spread on baking sheet and chill in refrigerator for 15-20 minutes.
4.) Remove from refrigerator and cut into desired shapes. Add butter and olive oil to skillet over med-high heat. Fry polenta shapes for 2-3 minutes per side, or until lightly browned and crispy.


Adapted from the food genius, Mark Bittman. 

Oatmeal Spiced Baked Apples

I've developed a new found respect for apples. My kindergarten friends and I used to have "apple wars" thanks to my friend's tree that provided copious amounts of the fruit. The game involved trying to be the first one to the treehouse while chucking apples at each other's butts, crushing their dreams of apple treehouse mastery. Why we came up with the demented idea to pulverize each other with apples is a mystery-- kindergarten is all about sharing and the Golden Rule. Oh, and telling your classmate he can draw a picture of a John Deere tractor on his desk and totally not get in trouble.

Sorry, Phillip. 

I now eat apples regularly rather than use them as weaponry. They're delicious plain, dipped in caramel, or swirled in good ol' peanut butter. But baked. Now we're talking.

I knew I had to post this recipe after my roommate, Molly, took one bite and said, "Where's your camera?! Take a picture! PUT IT ON YOUR BLOG." The wise one had spoken.

Baked apples are great as a dessert and can even be eaten for breakfast. I'm known for eating ice cream with vigor in the dead of winter, but these warm apples have inched their way up into being one of my favorite desserts-- just in time for the chilly weather. And trust me, you won't want to toss these at anyone attempting to invade your treehouse.

Oatmeal Spiced Baked Apples    serves: 2
2 apples
2 T brown sugar
2 T oatmeal (I used old-fashioned oats)
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon allspice
1/2 T butter, divided in two
1/2 cup hot water

1.) Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
2.) Remove the apple core, cutting to within a half inch of the bottom of the apple. The idea is to make a well inside the apple about an inch wide
3.) Mix the brown sugar, oatmeal, cinnamon, allspice, and any optional extras (like raisins or nuts) into a bowl. Divide mixture between the two apples and pack into the wells.
4.) Place apples in a baking dish and top each with 1/4 T butter. Pour the hot water into the bottom of the dish and cover loosely with aluminum foil.
5.) Bake for 20 minutes, then remove foil. Bake uncovered for an additional 20-25 minutes, or until the apple skin is soft and can be pierced easily with a fork.

Squash with Parmesan Rice

Let me preface this post by saying I consider myself to be a polite person. I cover my sneezes, hold open doors, and use my "inside voice."  

That last one took some work, though. My poor mother. 

MAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Carolyn's touching me but not really she's just pretending to and she ate the last oreo cookie that was totally MY cookie!!!! 

That was two years ago.

Nah...I kid, I kid. It was two and a half. 

Anyways, no matter how refined you are, allow me to issue a warning: this dish will cause a temporary revocation of proper manners, which is also known as TRPM. I believe the pharmaceutical industry is in the development stages of a drug for this condition. So no worries. Oh, and it's all the usual possible side-effects-- paralysis, death, impersonating Barry Manilow. 

I exuded all the symptoms of TRPM: eating straight out of the saucepan, scraping the bottom of the bowl, and my personal favorite, consuming a piece of squash that fell down my shirt. Classy. 

These ingredients were the leftovers from my stuffed squash dish, however it can just as easily be made fresh. The best word I can describe it as is scrumdiddilyumptious. Supercalifragilisticexpealadocious slides in at a close second. So eat up *burp* and enjoy! 

See? It's the TRPM.

Squash with Parmesan Rice      serves: 2

1/2 cup white rice, uncooked

3/4 cup chicken stock

1/4 cup white wine

3/4 cup cubed, cooked winter squash of your choice (butternut, acorn, or pumpkin all work)

1 t. each butter and brown sugar, melted together to form a syrup **only if using fresh squash.

1/2 T. butter

1/2 T. parmesan cheese

Handful of baked squash seeds

Handful of chopped parsley or any herb-- sage would be best

Cracked black pepper, to taste

1.) Cook rice according to the time provided on package directions in the chicken stock and white wine.

2.) Cube leftover squash into bite-sized pieces. If using fresh, boil in water until tender. Mix with butter/ brown sugar mixture in medium sized-bowl (again, only if fresh!).

3.) Add cooked rice to the bowl containing the squash. Gently stir in parmesan cheese and butter. Sprinkle on baked squash seeds and parsley. Add desired amount of pepper. 

Acorn Squash with Cranberry-Cornbread Stuffing

Squirrels were a major part of my childhood. I loved their cute beady little eyes and big bushy tails. My sister and I would frequently embark on "squirrel hunts," luring them to us by knocking two quarters together 'cause, you know, nothing attracts wild animals quite like products from the U.S. Mint. We also tried to catch fog with Ziploc bags at some point. Hey, we were willing to try anything at least once.

But there's also a sad side to my affection for squirrels. My old border-collie dog, Molly, loved the animals for a very different reason. She would patiently wait for hours under the bushes to chase a squirrel she spied in a tree. Unfortunately, I witnessed many of her sniper-esque captures. My Dad would bury the unlucky animals in what my sister and I deemed the "animal graveyard." I'm sure our homemade graves and twig crosses helped ease their furry souls into the afterlife.

It is for these reasons why I believe I was so tempted to try acorn (tee-hee...get it?) squash- in memory of the squirrely souls that perished before my eyes.

The dish is extremely filling. I mean, I hardly had room for pumpkin ice cream. Now that's saying something. It takes a bit of work, but the end result is totally worth it. Do it for the squirrels.

Acorn Squash with Cranberry-Cornbread Stuffing       Serves: 2
1 acorn squash, cut in half lengthwise
2 teaspoons butter
2 teaspoons brown sugar
1 T extra virgin olive oil
1/2 cup diced celery
1/2 cup diced sweet onion
1 tart apple, peeled, cored, and diced
1/2 t dried thyme
1 t curry powder
1/4 t cinnamon
2 cornbread muffins, cut in cubes
1/4 cup craisins
1/2 cup chicken stock
salt, to taste
pepper, to taste

1.) Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2.) Scoop out seeds (*Save for toasted seeds!) and stringy insides from the squash. Place in baking dish, cut sides up, with about an inch of water covering the bottom of the dish. Put butter and brown sugar in each well and place in oven.
3.) After 15 minutes of baking, baste squash with butter/brown sugar mixture pooled in the well. Continue to bake for another 30-45 minutes, or until fork tender.
4.) Heat olive oil in skillet and add celery, onion, apples, thyme, curry, and cinnamon. Cook until soft. Remove skillet from heat and set aside.
5.) Toast cornbread on baking sheet for about 10 minutes, or until golden and crispy.
6.) Add cranberries and cornbread to skillet mixture. Slowly stir in chicken broth. Season with salt and pepper.
7.) Add stuffing to fork-tender squash and place back in the oven until warmed through.

* Toasted acorn squash seeds taste like pumpkin ones. Just rinse off the pulp and place on a baking sheet with a little olive oil and salt. Bake at 350 degrees until golden.

adapted from: the lovely glutenfreegoddess.blogspot.com

Portobella Pasta in White Wine Sauce

I realize my recipes as of late have been fairly pasta-heavy, but this is mainly because I'm dealing with final exams. My classwork isn't leaving me much time to cook up time-consuming culinary creations. And I refuse to eat Easy-Mac. It might cause me to sprout a third eyeball or extra thumbs...or both. I've got better things to worry about right now.

It could be cool, though. I bet I'd get my own show on TLC. "'Thumbellina' Katie: A Story of Excess Digits." 

But I looooove pasta and all the starchy goodness it offers. It's also great because it comes in all kinds of sizes, shapes, and colors, so it never feels like you're eating the same meal repeatedly. I saw a box of Spongebob Squarepants macaroni noodles at the store. Pure temptation. 

This dish is easy peasy, weezy. It's quick and doesn't contain that creepy fluorescent-orange hue Easy Mac exhibits. And I promise it won't cause any excess appendage growth.


Portobella Pasta in White Wine Sauce       serves: 2
1 package fresh spinach ravioli pasta
2-3 baby portobella mushrooms, sliced
1 shallot, diced
1 T butter, divided into 1/2 T sections
1/4 cup white wine (I use cooking wine, but I turn 21 in 4 months. Then I'm going crazy, man.)
Salt
Pepper
Chopped fresh parsley, to top
Parmesan cheese, to top

1.) Boil pasta according to package directions.
2.) Heat 1/2 T butter in skillet over medium heat. Add shallot and mushrooms. Cook until mushrooms soften and shallot browns, or about 3-4 minutes.
3.) Remove veggies from skillet. Add last 1/2 T butter to skillet and white wine. Sprinkle in salt and freshly ground pepper. Cook until wine reduces by about half, then add in the mushroom/ shallot mixture until reheated.
4.) Separate pasta into serving bowls and drizzle sauce over the top. Sprinkle on parsley, cheese, and more pepper, if desired.

Hot Diggity Dog

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: If you happen to live or travel to Chicago, IL, please make sure to scoot your booty over to Chicago's Dog House-- 816 W. Fullerton Ave. Chicago, IL. It's imperative. Your stomach will thank you. Your butt may be a different story, but you can push those concerns to the rear of your mind occasionally.

Pun intended.

Much to the confusion of my parents, my sister and I love hot dogs. We didn't eat them too much as kids (probably a good thing), but we've recently developed an obsession. Carolyn and I are self-proclaimed EMAs: Encased Meat Aficionados.

Don't cringe, Mom. We hit up the campus gym regularly.


Our presence in this fine institution was naturally called for when we heard about the Dog House. We had to make sure the place's offerings stood up to our refined hot dog taste buds. The verdict: passed with flying colors. And poppyseeds.

We stood in awe of the menu for probably a solid five minutes. I think I drooled a little, but Carolyn was there to help me keep it together. The choices range from your typical Chicago-style dog to smoked duck with caramelized onions. Gourmet on a bun: perfect for wanting to be fancy and facing the reality of a college student budget at the same time.

After much deliberation, I decided to order the "French Poodle", a masterpiece including an all-beef frank, brie, grey poupon, and pear slices.

 Carolyn opted for the "T-Frank"loaded with bacon, cream cheese, avocado, and hot sauce.








The meal also came with "frips"- a cross between a fry and a chip made to order. You can even hear the guy peeling your potato as you wait. Now that's customer service.

So please do yourself a favor and stop in Chicago's Dog House. They even offer veggie dogs for vegetarians. So no excuses! Now if you'll pardon me, I have an appointment with the nearest elliptical machine.

C.R.A.P. Tuna Salad

Carrot, Raisin, and Pickle tuna salad! Brilliant, I know. College education at work.

I was struggling to come up with a good name for this dish. "Tuna Salad with Carrots?" Snore. "Tuna Mac?" Please. "Not Yo Momma's Tuna Salad?" So cliche- and borderline threatening.

It then dawned on me I had made a CRAP salad. At that moment, the stars aligned, world peace was attainable, and Lady Gaga put on a pair of pants.

The name is so appropriate. Crap happens to be one of my (and my Dad's) favorite words- snarky, but not too vulgar. And it has such a satisfying snap, like what the carrots and pickles add to the dish. It's also a little sweeter than the "s***" alternative. Cue the flavor of the raisins!

You can add all types of different veggies to change up the flavor. But trust me, this is a lovely alternative to the traditional tuna salad. Plus, if you feed this to friends, you can legitimately tell them you're giving them a bowl of crap for dinner. Just make sure they're your good friends.

C.R.A.P. Tuna Salad     serves: 1
3/4 short pasta (like macaroni, rotini, or shells), uncooked
1 individual packet chunk light tuna
1.5 T mayonnaise
4 baby carrots, diced
1 T raisins
1 baby dill pickle, chopped
Pepper
Salt

1.) Cook pasta according to pasta directions. Set aside to cool completely.
2.) Place diced carrots, raisins, and pickle in serving bowl. Flake tuna into the same bowl.
3.) Stir in mayo until well combined.
4.) Add cooled pasta to tuna. Mix together.
5.) Add pepper and salt, to taste. (Careful with the salt! The pickles may add plenty of salty flavor.)

Creamy Veggies and Noodles

I firmly believe a big bowl of noodles is one of the most comforting things on the planet. Like a hug from your grandma, fuzzy slippers, or a Snuggie.

Don't snicker. I feel sorry for those who've never experienced the Snuggie. However, I'm not sorry enough to let you have mine. Sleeves on a blanket-- genius.

Anyways, because I'm in the middle of some beastly final exams, a hug from my grandma would be quite nice right about now. But she lives a little too far away, so these noodles will have to suffice.

This recipe is super quick and simple to make. You could add chicken, if you like. That was my original plan until I started a paper for my political analysis course and forgot to defrost the chicken.

What can I say? Political operationalization of social scientific research is leaving me chickenless. And also puffy-eyed, but let's focus on the lack of poultry for now.

So whip out your Snuggie (or a regular ol' blanket works, too. I guess.) and enjoy these creamy noodles. Maybe double the recipe and bring some to your professor 'cause they're the ones that have to grade your exams. I'm sure they need a little grandma love, too.

Creamy Veggies and Noodles      Serves: 1
1 cup uncooked egg noodles
1 cup chicken broth
1 1/2 T all-purpose flour
Handful of baby carrots, chopped
1/4 of a yellow onion, sliced into large chunks
1/8 t. dried thyme
1 t. butter
cracked black pepper

1.) Bring chicken broth to a boil in medium-sized saucepan. Add noodles.
2.) Melt butter in a small skillet and add onion and carrots. Cook on med-low heat until onions start to brown and carrots soften, about 5 minutes.
3.) Add vegetables and flour to the cooking noodles. Stir while mixture simmers until the sauce thickens.
4.) Pour into a bowl, sprinkle with thyme and pepper, and enjoy!

Then go work on your final exams. Woo-hoo!

Abe's Pumpkin Bread

My Mom is an enabler.  She knows I'm addicted to pumpkin, but she still supplies the goods.

God bless her soul.

Mom emailed me this recipe from a cookbook she bought at the Abraham Lincoln Museum gift shop. Let me tell you, that purchase sure as heck beats out the lame plastic Abe stovepipe hats I'm sure they have stockpiled. The fake Lincoln beard? Let's not get ahead of ourselves, people.

I pretty much knew the recipe was going to kick major booty for two reasons:
1.) It has pumpkin. (HELLO!?)
2.) The bread was featured in a Lincoln cookbook, so he HAD to have loved it. Honest Abe would let you know if your pumpkin bread tasted like crap.

The bread is really moist and, quite simply, freaking awesome.  However, I must take a little lesson from our former President and admit I subbed raisins for the original recipe's pecans. But feel free to use both or leave 'em out entirely. I won't tell. Honest.

Abe's Pumpkin Bread    makes 1 loaf
1/2 tsp. nutmeg
3/4 tsp. salt
1/2 cup raisins (or nuts...or both)
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 2/3 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cup sugar
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. ginger
2 eggs
1/2 cup oil
1/2 can (or 8 oz.) pumpkin puree (from a 16 oz. can)

1.) Combine nutmeg, salt, raisins, cinnamon, flour, sugar, baking soda, and ginger. Set aside.
2.) In separate bowl, beat eggs, oil, and pumpkin until well mixed. Add dry ingredients gradually and mix well.
3.) Bake in a greased loaf pan at 350 degrees for one hour.

Pumpkin Pasta

I love pumpkin. It's such a multi-talented squash. Kinda like Shaq's basketball, rapping, and acting skills. 

No?

But really, pumpkin works as an ingredient for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And if you're strange like me, you can eat it straight out of the can with a little brown sugar. Nah, I'm kidding. It was...my friend. Yeah, uh, that's it. My friend also likes a lot of cinnamon on it, too. She told me. We're tight. 

So, since the Libby's canned pumpkin brand and I have become good buddies lately, I'm honoring you with my FAVORITE pumpkin recipe. Feel free to do the happy dance. I also accept the electric slide. 

I just made the Creamy Pumpkin Pasta with Sage, and I'm still thinking about it. Good thing there were no leftovers, or I would probably be scraping the bottom of a Glad Ware container at this moment. It reminds me of mac n' cheese, except way healthier. And that's a serious upgrade from Easy Mac, my friends.  

Creamy Pumpkin Pasta with Sage   Serves: 3-4
8 ounces pasta shells (or any pasta shape you like)

1 1/2 cups pumpkin purée
1 1/2 cups chicken stock

1/2 cup skim milk
 + 1 tablespoon flour
30 sage leaves, cut into ribbons

1 small onion, diced

1 tablespoon butter

3/4 teaspoon salt

20 grinds fresh black pepper

3 tablespoons Parmesan cheese

1. Cook pasta according to package directions.

2. Meanwhile, sauté onion and sage in butter for 5 minutes over medium heat. Add 3/4 cup of broth, 1/2 cup of milk, and 1 tablespoon flour. Stir occasionally for 5 minutes or so.

3. Add pumpkin puree to simmering broth and stir well. Add salt, pepper, and remaining 3/4 cup of broth. Reduce heat and simmer on medium low for 10 to 12 minutes, or until sauce reaches a thicker consistency.

4. Stir in Parmesan cheese. Toss sauce with pasta and serve. Add more cheese and pepper, if desired.
adapted from: cheaphealthygood.blogspot.com

Beef Bourguignon- College Style.

I feel like I've just discovered something amazing, almost like the caveman that discovered fire. Or even that other one who discovered he saved mucho money by switching to Geico.

The slow-cooker. I didn't even realize I had one. Apparently my roommate has had it for over a year and never used it. The right thing to do was, obviously, to put it to good use since it's getting chilly. Fear of an angry uprising from unused kitchen appliances also gnawed at the back of my mind.

Don't worry, Mr. Egg Slicer. I'll get to you tomorrow. 


I ran across this recipe in a cookbook I bought awhile back. It only calls for a few simple ingredients, and it's relatively low-cost because it uses a cheap cut of beef. The meat won't be tough because the slow-cooker cooks it, well, slowly so all the juices and moisture break up the stringy fibers.

Don't be afraid of bourguignon. I can't pronounce it worth a darn, but it tastes awesome. Plus, you sound totally high-class if you can master the pronunciation.

Faking high-classiness when, in fact, you're spending like Scrooge is a true accomplishment in college.
...You're welcome.

The recipe makes quite a bit, so invite people over. Or if you're like me, invite your punk little sister over to be a guinea pig for new recipes. I'm pretty sure I can beat out the campus cafeteria's 2 lb. cheese quesadillas every time. Bring it, suckas. I'm armed and dangerous with a slow-cooker.

Simple Beef Bourguignon    Serves: 4-5
1 can Healthy Request condensed cream of mushroom soup
1/2 cup dry red wine (I bought cooking wine since I'm not 21/ would be 100% paranoid with a fake ID)
1 packet (from a box of 2) beefy onion soup mix
1/2 t. dried thyme
1.5 lbs. lean beef chuck chunks
2 cups baby carrots
8 oz. sliced mushrooms (any kind will work)
Pepper

1.) Put mushroom soup, wine, soup mix, and thyme in a 3-qt or larger slow cooker. Whisk until blended.
2.) Add beef, carrots, and mushrooms. Stir until coated. Cover and cook on high for 4 hours or low for 8 to 10 hours until meat is very tender.
3.) Sprinkle with fresh ground pepper and a dash of thyme. Serve alone or with egg noodles.