Spaghetti Carbonara for One

I attended a wedding over the weekend that was nothing short of epic. Practically all of my childhood friends were there, I finally nailed the Electric Slide, and there was a Candy Bar. It was like the 4th grade playground all over again--Except we've all graduated from our training bras.

I also ate enough Skittles to put me in danger of re-tasting the rainbow.

Ah, yes. And the lovely bride and groom were like the William and Kate of central Illinois.

But for now, Beyonce's "Single Ladies" is still my jam. So this recipe is reworked for those of us with still-naked ring fingers. It takes all of 10 minutes max, too. As Ms. Beyonce would (probably) say, Single serving WIN!

Spaghetti Carbonara for One   
2 oz. thin spaghetti (about the diameter of a quarter)
1 egg, separated
1 T. bacon bits
1/4 cup frozen peas
1 T. parmesan cheese
Salt and Pepper
1.) Cook the spaghetti in boiling, salted water. Drain pasta and reserve 1/4 cup of the pasta water.
2.) Add pasta to the same pot over low heat. Add the egg white, peas, and bacon. Stir until the egg white is just set. Season with salt and pepper.
3.) In a separate bowl, add the egg yolk and parmesan. Vigorously stir in the hot pasta. Toss well. Serve with more pepper and cheese, if desired. Add a bit of pasta water if the mixture is too sticky.

Cherry Tomato and Feta Sandwich with Dill Mayo

I don't believe in love at first sight. That hoo-ha is reserved for Lifetime movies. I do, however, firmly believe in love at first bite. 


Ha! I am so the world's first person to make that connection.

As you can see from the pictures, I clearly had no intention of making this sandwich camera-ready. The whole she-bang came together mostly because 1.) I wanted to eat my cherry tomatoes before they morphed into tomato raisins and 2.) I had a dusting of feta that was close to becoming fetid.

Feta! Fetid! The wordplay is just too much to handle.

Sorry, I just love cheesy jokes. Ha! Aw, crap. There I go again.

Ok, I'm ending this post to spare my dear readers from any more tiring puns. Oh, lord. Seriously. The end.

Psst! Check out The DePaulia's article on my food blog! Student Cooking Site a Recipe for Success

Cherry Tomato and Feta Sandwich with Dill Mayo  Serves: 1
2 slices bread (I used a whole-wheat sandwich thin)
4-5 cherry tomatoes, sliced
1 T. feta cheese
1 T. mayo
Pinch of dried dill
Salt and pepper
Torn romaine lettuce
1.) Split the sandwich thin and top one side with sliced cherry tomatoes. Season with salt and pepper, then add the feta and romaine.
2.) Spread the mayo and a pinch of dill on the other bread half. Smush on the tomato half, slice in half, and enjoy.

Roasted Chile Cheese Smashburgers

I've got a pretty stellar smashing arm. Case in point: the wasp who thought it was the Alpha dog in my kitchen.

No, my buzzing enemy. I am the Alpha and Omega of my apartment kitchen.

So I hunted that sucker down like Navy Seal Team 6 tracked Osama. My weapon of choice was a rolled up Chicago Tribune and (wo)manpower instead of high-powered automatic weaponry. Tightly wound newspaper still does damage, though. Just ask my poor fern plant and permanently bent venetian blinds. But you can't contact the wasp since he's in a billion pieces.

Fist pump!

Fortunately, wasp hunting does not have to be a prerequisite for this recipe, but smashing skills are a must. Smashing the burger in a skillet forms a delicious crust and keeps the inside incredibly juicy. And just imagine roasted chile pepper and cheese as the icing for a very beefy cake. I added a scoop of sour cream and scallion/tomato topping for maximum burger glory, but it'd also be fine as is.

Roasted Chile Cheese Smashburgers    Serves: 1
4 oz. (about 1/4 of a 1 lb. package) ground sirloin
Salt and Pepper
1/4 cup grated cheddar cheese
1 whole roasted chile pepper from a 5oz. can
1 slice sandwich bread, toasted (or a burger bun if you don't want open-faced)

For the optional topping:
Sour cream
1/4 tomato, diced
1/2 scallion, sliced
Salt
Lime juice
1.) Form the meat into a ball, handling it as gently as possible. Season with salt and pepper.
2.) Heat a drizzle of oil in a skillet over medium-high heat. Add the meat and cook for one minute, then smash with the back of a spatula to around 1/3 inch thickness. Cook for two more minutes, flip, and pile on the chile pepper and cheese. Cook for 1-2 more minutes, covering with a lid to let the cheese melt.
3.) Place the burger on the toasted bread. Top with sour cream and the tomato/scallion mixture.

Cheddar-Stuffed Pesto French Toast

This dish salutes many different lands. World harmony in sandwich form- isn't that what all Miss America contestants wish for?

Let's begin with our base: the french toast. Oui, oui! Actually, the toast may have had its origins in England. So when that's taken into account, this dish is covering two European superpowers.

We say Ciao, Italia! with the pesto. It's the besto. (Couldn't resist.)

Sharp cheddar's appearance pays homage to America's Heartland.  God bless you, Wisconsin.

And finally, Iceland's fermented shark meat tops off our Tour de Sandwich.

...Just kidding about that third ingredient. Cheddar cheese is gross, man!

I'm so glad we all survived the 2011 Rapture. This is definitely a dish you need to eat before we all expire in an apocalyptic doom. Maybe you should make it sooner rather than later, y'know, just in case Harold Camping's predictions were a day off or something.

Cheddar-Stuffed Pesto French Toast   Serves: 1
2 slices sandwich bread (slightly stale works best)
1 egg, beaten
1 T. pesto
1 T. milk
1 oz. cheddar cheese, grated
A few jarred roasted red pepper strips, chopped
1.) Whisk the egg, pesto, and milk together in a bowl. Set aside.
2.) Place the cheese and red pepper on a slice of bread and top with the remaining slice. Lay sandwich in the egg mixture for about 10 seconds, then carefully flip and coat the other slice with the egg and pesto.
3.) Heat a skillet over medium-low heat. Add a pat of butter (or cooking spray) and cook until golden brown. Flip and repeat with the other side. The lower heat ensures that the cheese will melt without burning the bread.

Bacon-Cheddar Cornmeal Pancakes

Do you ever find yourself stuck in a conversation with a word vomiter? You know, the people who just won't. stop. talking:

"Hey, Susie! How are you?"
"Well, I'm good but I found a brown lump on my toe and I'm not sure if it's contagious and I had a taco for lunch today and categorized the shredded lettuce by size and ended up with 15 strands of .45 inch romaine and only 13 .34 inch romaine strands. Isn't that crazy?! And I think I met my husband today because we were both looking at the same brand of mildew remover and I was like no way we were like so meant for lifelong commitment."

With WV's you've got a few conversation-ending options: Sprinting or farting would probably effectively cease the blabber, but I'd show them this:

A stack of bacon-cheddar pancakes enrobed with the glistening, yolk-y delight of a perfectly fried egg. The word vomiter will be too stunned by the glory of savory flapjacks for any additional nonsense. 

PS- I'm fairly certain egg yolks help students keep their sanity in the lead up to finals. Just a feeling.

Bacon-Cheddar Cornmeal Pancakes   Serves: 1

1 egg, beaten

1/2 cup cornmeal

1 t. baking powder

1/4 t. salt

1 T. bacon bits

1 T. shredded cheddar

1/4 cup + 2 T. milk

1 T. butter, melted

1 more egg (for frying)

Sour cream (optional)

1.) Stir cornmeal, baking powder, salt, bacon bits, and cheddar cheese together in a bowl. Whisk in the milk and butter. Add one tablespoon of the beaten egg--discard the remainder. Stir well and set aside.

2.) Heat a medium skillet over medium heat. Add a pat of butter (or cooking spray) and scoop pancake mix by 1/4 cup measurements. Cook until one side is golden, flip, and repeat the process. Remove to a plate and keep warm.

3.) Add a bit more butter to the same skillet. Heat over medium and crack in the egg. Cook until the whites are almost set, add a teaspoon of water to the skillet, and cover. Let cook for 20 more seconds, or until the white is set but yolk is still runny. Set the cooked egg on the pancakes, sprinkle with pepper, and serve with sour cream.

Sausage-Stuffed Sweet Potato

Date: May 17, 2011
Footwear: Heated slippers
Apparel: College sweatshirt-- hood up, strings tightly drawn around my face
Question: WTF, MOTHER NATURE?!

Seemingly Earth is confused about the seasons. It's so windy, cold, and downright miserable at my school that I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up to my calendar magically flipped to November. I guess it's easy to forget if you've only been in existence for 4.54 BILLION YEARS. 

When it's cold, I turn to my food love: carbs. And the whiter, the better. I tried to like brown over white rice-- It's healthier! It's nuttier!-- but my taste buds don't lie, and they cried for the nutritionally empty offerings of Wonderbread-esque carbohydrates.

Sweet potatoes rescue me from nutritional doom and satisfy the carb cravings. I used to think of sweet potatoes as merely a vessel for marshmallows or butter, but stuff it with sausage, veggies, and cheese, and you've got a satisfying meal.

And, please Spring, hurry up! My skin is as pasty as the carbohydrates I love.

Sausage-Stuffed Sweet Potato   Serves:1
1 sweet potato
1/2 cup cooked italian sausage (1/2 italian sausage link, crumbled)
1/2 cup frozen chopped broccoli (or fresh if you've got it!)
1 T. mined red onion
Couple of fresh mozzarella slices
Salt and Pepper
Parsley, to top
1.) Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2.) Poke holes in the sweet potato with a fork. Microwave on high in 1 minute intervals until soft.
3.) Combine broccoli, sausage, red onion, and a dash of salt and pepper in a small bowl. Split open the sweet potato and partially scoop out some of the insides. Mash into the broccoli/sausage mixture. Stuff filling back into the potato and top with mozzarella.
3.) Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until cheese is melted and potato is warmed through.

Rushville Salad

There are all kinds of salads that pay homage to a particular place: Illinois, the Waldorf, Asia, and Wendy's.  Ok, maybe that last one doesn't quite fit.

Anyways, this salad is named after my little hometown located in West Central Illinois. It's the kind of place where a woman had two eggs stolen from her refrigerator and it made the weekly newspaper. It's also where you and your sister can attempt to sell milk cartons, pine needles, and dirty sticks as "crafts"at the end of your driveway and your dear mother knows nothing along the lines of Nightline or 20/20 will happen.

Rushville is home to some pretty killer school musicals, a single traffic light, and Pizza Unlimited. Legend has it the inventor of the Chia Pet resides there, but I'll believe it once I see a fully-sprouted Chia House.

Pizza Unlimited was our Saturday night hotspot.  While waiting for our ham pizza (Authentic Italian? No. Delicious? Yes.), my sis and I would load up at the salad bar. Our salads would always include the Holy Trinity: ham, peas, and hard-boiled egg. (Amen.) Topped with crushed club crackers, cheddar, and ranch dressing, it made for a wild Saturday night.

Rushville Salad  Serves: 1
Handful of mixed salad greens
2 slices deli ham, roughly chopped
1/4 cup frozen peas, thawed
1 hard-boiled egg, roughly chopped
2 T. shredded cheddar cheese
Ranch dressing
2 club crackers, crushed
1.) Add greens, ham, peas, egg, and cheddar into a bowl. Drizzle with Ranch and top with crushed crackers. Eat while your ham pizza is baking in the oven. Wash down with an A&W Root Beer.

Peanut Butter Hummus

As Barbie eventually separated from Ken, I am now breaking up PB&J's relationship for PB&G: Peanut butter and garbanzos.

Don't worry, Jam. Buttered Toast will always be there for you.

I had some pita and cucumber begging for a hummus bath, but wanted to evade the $5.99 price for a tiny tub of the dip. So I sauntered up to the bean aisle, bypassing Cannellini Carmen and Pinto Pete (beans and I are on first name basis by now) for good ol' Garbanzo Gary. .89 cents. Boo-yah.

Then I located the requisite Tahini paste- $8.99. Boo-yah, minus the yah.

Turns out peanut butter is an awesome substitute for the traditional sesame seed paste. It's incredibly cheap, too. The entire recipe comes out to about $1.00. I was nervous it'd be sweet, but it's not at all. I timidly tried a scoop, died, went to heaven, then came back to hunt down a wasp buzzing about my kitchen and prep for final exams.

Peanut Butter Hummus
1 (15 oz) can garbanzo beans, drained with the liquid reserved
1 T. peanut butter
1/2 t. salt
1/2 t. cumin
1 small garlic clove
2 T. extra virgin olive oil
Juice of 1 lemon
Paprika, to dust on top (optional)
1.) Add beans, peanut butter, salt, cumin, lemon juice, and garlic into a food processor. Pulse until finely ground. Scrape down the sides of the bowl.
2.) With the motor running, slowly pour in the 2 T. extra virgin olive oil + 2 T. reserved bean liquid. Pulse until smooth. Add a bit more bean liquid if the hummus is too thick. Sprinkle with a dusting of paprika. Enjoy with some pita and store the rest in the fridge for up to a week.

Adapted from: Cook This, Not That!

Egg and Vietnamese Pickled Carrot Sandwich

A jar of pickled carrots caught my eye at the grocery store the other day. Cut in matchsticks, neatly aligned, and placed in an attractive jar, I was sold. Bugs Bunny's choice snack was destined for my basket. Oooh, and layered on an egg sandwich sounded pretty fantastic.

Then I caught sight of the price-- $6.99. I said, "hot damn!", realized a toddler was eyeing me, and subsequently confirmed I am nowhere near ready to have children yet.

That's a lot of lessons learned from an over-priced jar of vegetables.

Anyways, nothing was going to stop me from a briny, crunchy carrot-y sandwich. So I took matters into my own hands by hopping (ha!) over to the produce section. Baby carrots were $1.00. This time, however, I took care to censor my language. Children are the future, you know?

Egg and Vietnamese Pickled Carrot Sandwich    Serves: 1
1/2 lb. baby carrots, cut into matchsticks
1/2 t. kosher salt
1/2 cup unseasoned rice vinegar
1 T. plus 1 t. sugar
1/2 cup water

For the sandwich:
1 hamburger bun
1 egg
1 T. mayo
Lettuce
Sriracha (optional, but awesome)
Salt and pepper

1.) In a bowl, stir salt, rice vinegar, sugar, and water together. Add carrots and let marinate for at least one hour. Cover and chill in the refrigerator--they'll last for about a week.
2.) For the sandwich: In a small skillet coated with non-stick spray, fry the egg over medium heat. Break the yolk, flip, and cook until the other side is cooked- about 15 seconds. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.
3.) Place the cooked egg and lettuce on one burger bun half. Spread the mayo and a squirt of sriracha on the other. Top with your desired amount of pickled carrots and enjoy!

California (Un)Roll Bowl

I had a real college-kid dilemma on my hands last week. Let's break it down:

1. I was craving sushi. Like a ravaging pregnancy craving. Except my uterus is very much empty. Happy Unmother's Day to me!
2. I eat California rolls because I am a raw fish pansy.
3. You need crab to make California rolls.
4. I may have to sell my own leg to buy crab leg.
5. Imitation crab is two dollars.
6. Imitation crab is...an imitation.

For the sake of crab-craving college kids nationwide, I flung the imitation crab into my basket and cruised to the cash register before the freaky red coloring blinded me with second thoughts.

The result? Not bad! Turns out "imitation crab" is just whitefish with little crabby pieces to give it the familiar flavor. So, basically what I'm trying to say is you won't die a freaky imitation crustacean death.

I got the idea for a sushi bowl from Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything. It's genius because  a.) I don't feel like investing in sushi-rolling equipment and b.) I'm a terror with chopsticks. Somehow I managed to get a tempura shrimp-filled bra the last time I graced a sushi joint with my presence. Let's just say I'm pro-American shovel: aka the fork. God bless this land.

California (Un)Roll Bowl   Serves: 1
1 cup cooked white rice
1 tsp. rice wine vinegar
1 tsp. sesame seeds
1/2 cup imitation crab
1/4 avocado, sliced thin
1/4 cup carrots, cut into matchsticks
1/4 cup cucumber, sliced thin
1 scallion, diced
Soy sauce
1.) Stir rice wine vinegar into the cooked rice. Put in a bowl and set aside.
2.) Heat a small skillet over medium-low heat. Add sesame seeds and toast, shaking occasionally, until the seeds are light brown. Remove from heat.
3.) Add the crab, avocado, carrots, and cucumber to the rice bowl. Scatter the scallion and toasted sesame seeds over the top. Drizzle with soy sauce and serve.

Adapted from: Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything

Raspberry and Mozzarella Panini

Pssst! Check out The State Journal Register's article on my blog!
I don't mind sharing food with others. Want some baby carrots? Go for it.  Need a fix for your sweet tooth? Dig in those chocolates stashed in my pantry corner. Have a hankerin' for some fermented bean paste? Well, uh, I can't really help you there. But I totally would if I could.

One thing my egalitarian values do not extend to is my Grandma Phyllis' homemade raspberry jam. Need some jam to finish off your peanut butter sandwich? Sorry, man. I'm leaving you out in the cold. Time to face the reality of a dog-eat-raspberry-jam-dog world.

Even though my Grandma's legendary raspberry jam is off-limits, you should certainly still give this sandwich a go. I saw a similar combination in Giada DeLaurentiis' Giada at Home cookbook. The combination of raspberries, fresh mozzarella, and rosemary was just too unique not to try. I'm sure it's still good with, y'know, ...Smuckers.

Raspberry and Mozzarella Panini   Serves: 1
2 slices sandwich bread
2 t. raspberry jam
3 thin slices of fresh mozzarella cheese
Pinch of dried rosemary, crushed
Extra virgin olive oil
Salt
1.) Preheat a panini press/ George Foreman/ skillet (medium, if using).
2.) Meanwhile, assemble the sandwich. Top one bread slice with mozzarella and a pinch of salt. Top the other with the raspberry jam and sprinkle on the rosemary. Press together and lightly drizzle a bit of olive oil on each side.
3.) Grill until the cheese is melted and bread is golden brown. Cut in half and serve.

Guacamole Rice

Since Cinco de Mayo is quickly approaching,
My chicken arms can finally chest-press 40 lbs. at the campus gym,
And Osama is literally sleeping with the fishes,

It's time to celebrate with a bowl of guacamole rice! Ole, Ole! USA, USA! 


Let's keep the good vibes rolling with this insanely tasty side dish. I got the idea after ordering mahi-mahi (Yeah, my parents were visiting) that came with "mexican green rice." It was certainly green, but as to what was causing the hue was a mystery-- the rice was so flavorless the color might have been due to a dollar bill emulsion. Not a good way to honor U.S. currency, if you ask me.

I figured I'd make my own verdant grains by mixing in an ingredient that makes sense: avocado. Toss in some green onion, lime, salt, and jalapeno, and you've got something far tastier than any product at the U.S. Mint.

Guacamole Rice    Serves: 1
1/4 cup uncooked white rice
1/2 cup water
1/2 avocado
1 small green onion, finely chopped
2-3 rings jalapeno, minced (jarred)
1/2 lime
Salt
1.) Bring rice and water to a boil in a pot. Once boiling, reduce heat to low and cover. Cook for 15 minutes.
2.) Add avocado, green onion, jalapeno, and juice of 1/2 a lime in a bowl. Mash until smooth and season with salt. Toss with the cooked rice and serve immediately.